Monday, June 22, 2009

I am officially starting a new healthy lifestyle. So here, in my blog, I will "journalize" my experience. A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step and it really does seem like it will be a long journey for me. But, here's the first step.
My goals are to start exercising every day, lose 30 pounds (I'm 165 now) and eat healthier (chocolate has started to take over my life.) I never knew one could be addicted to chocolate but it's true for me. I don't have a problem with chocolate, I have a problem without it. I need to eat more fresh fruits and vegetables and less meat.
I think the first step is one of the hardest, however. I am so entrenched in habit, good or bad. I am used to having hot chocolate in the morning, without it, I'm all depressed. You don't know how many times I convinced myself that a cup of hot chocolate in the morning is okay after swearing off the stuff. Every time I attempt to lose weight and start a new healthy lifestyle, I sabotage myself! I give in, or give up. I convince myself that I'm being too extreme. I decide that today is not the day to start my diet, a Monday would be better, or the first of a month. Or, I cheated already, might as well wait until tomorrow.
I find that I do this in other aspects of my life as well like exercising, practicing cello, dressing better, reading my scriptures, writing and finishing my novel, trying out for musicals, staring a band, cleaning the house, planting flowers... I lack inner discipline to achieve my goals. I lack the stick-to-it-ness that one needs to change, truly change. But I NEED TO CHANGE!! Quoting from "Don't Cry For Me Argentina", "I have to let it happen, I have to change." I will never discover who I really am inside if I do not change. If I do not discipline myself and develop healthy habits - good, positive habits.
So, I take the first step...and hope that there will be those along the journey to cheer me on and wish me success.

3 comments:

Alisa said...

Good luck! Maybe some herbal tea in the morning will help kick the hot cocoa habit? Not nearly as tasty, but it is a warm, soothing beverage.

Rent2own said...

Hey, I'm behind you 100%! Don't forget to call me if you ever want me to be your biggest fan and help you with visualization! :)

Julie

Trisha said...

Hello! You go girl! I have been swimming laps in the morning! So does Sandy! Please join us!

Keep up the good work...I so understand. I feel completly out of control in all aspects of my life these days.